Now, as we all know, this journey can be a bit bumpy at times. It can be filled with some major pot holes
and some unreal sort of curves -- and it's those times that we need all the coping skills possible. The trick is --
and this is important -- to stack up as many coping skills as you can during the smooth times, so that when
the bumpy times come, you'll be ready. Trust me, if you've got a great set of coping skills at hand, and a
great support group or safety net as some folks will call them, ready, then those bumps and curves don't last
nearly as long and, sometimes, they don't seem quite as bad.
Some of the things that help me cope:
When I'm feeling myself go down I do my best NOT to merely sit and dwell on things. Just muddling over
things is horrible for me because it continues to focus my mind on the depressive things that are bringing me
down. Getting up and doing something to distract my train of thought helps -- even when it's the LAST thing
I want to do. It's in my nature to want to sit there and muddle -- I have to at times will and force myself up
and moving to do something else other than that. Not always easy, but mucho better for me.
I have a great support group -- both online and IRL (in real life) -- I'm blessed, truly. When I'm slipping up, I
often don't even notice it -- mania is very tricky like that -- it feels so darn good that often times you don't
realize you're "there" until it's too late. I've got several friends that I trust that know me very well. They know
when to say, "Hey -- are you taking on a few too many projects?" "Hmmm is that red lipstick you've got on?"
"You spent HOW much on your credit cards?" Those friends know how to tweak my buttons when I need
them tweaked -- the thing is simply that I have to be willing to pay attention to them when they start say
these things. It's so easy to just brush off the comments and be like... "Oh, don't worry... it's nothing..." But the
thing is... quite often when I'm manic, I don't see the things that others see... it pays me to listen. Again -- not
always an easy thing.
And these same friends -- I know if I feel myself slipping downward, I just have to contact them and they will
be doing anything to help me back on the road to what what I call "the sweet spot." Again -- it's one of
those things... I have to call them for them to help me, if I don't call, they won't know....
Many folks tend to isolate themselves when they are going into that downward spiral. This is one of the worst
things you can do. I heard it described this way... Think of this -- Have you ever watched the Discovery
Channel? What happens to that lone little antelope that wanders off alone from the pack? You guessed it!
That isolated antelope becomes cheetah bait! You need to hang with the pack. Don't go wandering off
alone. We don't want anyone here becoming cheetah bait. Whenever you think you want to just go off by
yourself, you want to be alone, you want to isolate, you want to turtle, whatever you might call it -- just
remember the Discovery Channel lesson.
I know folks get tired of hearing this -- they heard it from their mama's when they were younger, they heard
it from teachers in school, they hear it now from psychiatrists and counselors -- and now you'll hear it here:
sleep is important. Bipolar disorder is very much tied to sleep and study after study supports this. Sleep is to
the bipolar patient what a balanced diet is to the heart patient. Make sure you get enough sleep -- and
not too much -- you need the right balance.
Medications -- one thing I had to realize is that just because one thing works great for someone else it
doesn't mean it's gonna be the same for me. And conversely, just because someone had a rough
experience with something, doesn't mean I will. I have friends that both lost and gained weight on the
same medication. Different medications afffect different folks different ways. And also, just because a
medication is designated for one illness doesn't mean that it won't work for another. When I was first
diagnosed I was really confused as to why on earth I woulg be taking medications for epilepsy, when I
wasn't epileptic. Then I was on another medication for Alzheimer's for a while -- and though I may have my
moments, I'm not an Alzheimber's patient. But I benefited from the medications. Try not to let the "labels"
trouble you. Look at the results, not the labels.
Along the lines of medications -- please be careful of "over the counter" medications. Just because it is over
the counter it doesn't mean that it won't interract with the medications that you're on. Always check with
your doctor before you start taking other medications. Also -- if you see more than one doctor, make sure
that each doctor is fully aware of ALL the medications you are on -- if your family doctor doesn't know that
your psychiatrist prescribed certain medications for you, then he or she might prescrible something that
doesn't mix well with what you're taking. Be sure to tell what you're taking -- it is very important.
With every new medication and every medication adjustment expect some changes -- it's rare that there
aren't a few. I like to think of it like this -- your body is sitting there and WHAM! all of a sudden it's hit with this
new medication -- picture (if you can) your body's eyes getting really big and looking at you and saying,
"What the heck?!!" Your body has to adjust to the new medication -- some medications take longer to
adjust to than others. Each med has their own set of side effects. Each medication has its own timeframe for
how soon it will start to work. Eventually your body will settle back down and get back into the swing of
things -- it's just a time issue. For some medications it can take a week or so and for others it can take several
weeks or even a couple of months for the true effects of the medication to be seen. Be in contact with the
doctor during the time of adjustment -- he or she will let you know what side effects are "normal" and which
ones indicate that you need to come off a medication.
And that leads us to the next thing that I've found so very helpful. Communication. Being open and honest
with my psychiatrist has not always been easy. But the more open I am and the more willing I am to
communicate and let myself be heard, the better I have gotten. The same is true for therapy. I've seen the
most results when I've been willing to have the courage to say things that I really didn't want to say and to
tackle subjects that I really didn't want to tackle. It's true -- therapy is work. But it's worth it.
If you've been diagnosed and you're simply trying to go through this with just medication, then I'd suggest
that you see a therapist as well. For me, I have been in therapy since my diagnosis and it's made all the
difference. I've been able to work through things with my counselor as they came along and in turn she's
helped to equip me with many coping skills that have become invaluable.
And finally, but not lastly, my Christian faith has played a major role in my journey. I have a strong support
group at my church and prayer has become a vital part of my life. If you don't have a place of worship,
then I would suggest that you start looking for one. You'll find something there that no Friday night bar will
ever give you... I have more peace now than ever before. If you've never listened to the Brooklyn
Tabernacle Choir Be Glad CD, then please -- go out, buy one today.
I'll add more coping skills as I think of them... I hope that these help...
On our message board, I've posted this as well -- if you have a coping skill that has been especially helpful
for you, then please, go over and share it with us... it's been said that knowledge is power. For those that
have bipolar disorder, the more coping skills the better. We look forward to seeing you on the message
board.
(((BIG HUGS)))
"Obie"
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